Relationship Advice Question
It is possible to love two people. What is really impossible is to only love one person! In the future our ability to love shall explode and we will be able to love many, many people and they shall love us in return. The more people who love us the better, that way we are not dependent on only one person for love. This is extremely helpful in preventing a dependency that stunts our self-realization. To love more than one person sexually is also possible. What is hard is to commit to more than one person as a partner. At this point we have trouble committing to one person and loving her or him unconditionally. In the future, as we mature emotionally, we will be able to love and commit ourselves to each other in many creative ways.
How do I go about putting my marriage behind me? My wife went to another woman.
I am sure your wife does love both you and the other woman. To lose your partner is always painful. It is a heartbreak, any way you look at it. It hurts. It really hurts your heart. The best way to deal with this kind of experience is to open up to it, rather than closing down. It was exactly this type of heartbreak that prodded my own transformation. When we are hurt, we have the choice to become more defended and harder or to open up and become softer and more alive.
The thing to remember is that you are lovable and that you are loved. You have done nothing wrong and there is nothing wrong with you.
Feeling your hurt can open you up to a new way of being alive. Hurt is the first sign of life. It is like a frostbitten hand; it hurts like hell when it is warming up. When it is frozen and ready to die, there is no pain. We hurt when we are returning to life.